The Rolex Incident

Fashion Shoot Fursday!

MrsGeoff wears ‘Miami Volvo Big Logo’, by Geoff Buys Cars, whilst also sporting a Rolex Datejust.

The T shirt was £19, and is unique, printed to order and rare… I’ve not sold any other than this one, so like MrsGeoff, the T Shirt is 1 of 1.

The Rolex Datejust was a birthday present from MrGeoff – in the UK with papers it would have been around £6,000-8,000.

MrGeoff wears the ‘Volvo Adventure’ T shirt by Geoff Buys Cars featuring our very own Volvo 850, whilst sporting a Patek Phillipe Complication timepiece, a snip at just £81,000.

You never actually own a Patek Phillipe, you merely look after it for the next generation.

I tried to get a Patek Phillipe in England at a London jewellers. I walked in, thanked them for looking after my watches and told them I was the next generation. Although the argument was convincing, the security team were armed.

So I bought one in Egypt instead.

Based on the behaviour of the two small Geoff’s and the amount of moaning that comes from the ungrateful little buggers, they’ll be lucky to inherit a £40 watch, a smashed iPhone XR and a fleet of decaying Volvos, let alone an £80,000 time keeper.

Maybe there’s a point in life where your bank balance, financial security and ego make an £8,000 or £81,000 watch seem like a good idea…?

For me and my life an £8,000 car is expensive and an £80,000 car is insanity, so the idea of spending that sort of money on a watch when my phone can tell the time (and I’ve never yet been on time for anything anyway) seems beyond crazy.

So far I’ve thrown £2,400 ish at my diesel Volvo 850, but if I won the lottery tomorrow it wouldn’t be going anywhere (though it might get a respray and I’d definitely pay to get my remote central locking working).

Life and happiness and fun and adventure is far more important than status and stuff.

I’m here for the experience and the stories, and these watches have paid dividends in both…

Shortly after these photos was taken the Patek fell apart and had to be returned to my new best friend ‘Ali G The Watch Man’ to be repaired, and to have new strap fitted.

What’s even better, and something that became more hilarious as the day wore on, is that the Rolex has proven impossible to undo…

I WhatsApped ‘Ali G’ and he says it’ll loosen up over time, but apparently 24 hours wasn’t enough. MrsGeoff’s Rolex simply will not come off.

It was hilarious in the hotel, and then utterly ridiculous at the airport.

Trying to explain to the Egyptian security staff that the high grade Rolex sold in their country was of such an impossibly good quality that it couldn’t be removed proved quite the linguistic challenge.

Time after time we went through various scanners, put the bags on rollers and stood still like teapots whilst security staff searched us for Horus knows what… each time the conversation and ensuing fracas was the same.

“Take watch off”
“It doesn’t come off”
“Take watch off”
“Like I just said, it will not come off!”
“Take watch off”
“You try it! Go on, you try. See?!”
new security team member arrives
“Why she no take watch off?”

Repeat the steps above for infinity.

After the third or fourth totally unnecessary baggage check and body scan, MrsGeoff finally lost it.

The watch would not come off, no matter how the staff asked the question – nor would they understand the simple stupidity of the situation.

More and more staff arrived, with every one repeating the same three words… ‘take watch off’. The scene was genuinely laughable.

Eventually MrsGeoff offered to walk through the security scanner in the nuddy wearing nothing but the Rolex, and it was at this point that all hell broke loose.

I’m honestly not sure who threw the first grey luggage tray, but I sure as heck heard it make contact with the head of security’s head. After that it’s anyone’s guess who grabbed who, who kicked what or where the Rolex went, but it got ugly quickly.

At one point I was convinced I’d heard a gunshot, as I sprinted across the airport to get involved, desperately trying to put my belt and shoes back on, whilst shoving my phone, passport, wallet, sunglasses and boarding pass into my pockets and simultaneously shouting to the kids “JUST STAY THERE IT’S HAPPENING AGAIN!!”

Suitcases were flying everywhere, other passengers were piling in just for that one chance to vent all that airport frustration, three Russians forced the body search guy through the X ray machine whilst hundreds of angry, queuing travellers dived in on the action. It was a crazy kinda wild!

As I write this a couple of hours after the ‘incident’, I’m glad to report that the security staff are expected to make a swift recovery.

I’m also told MrsGeoff is said to be in good spirits, sat in an Egyptian prison, drinking tea and… still wearing the Rolex.

Now, would a financed Patek or a Klarna’d Rolex give you a story like that?!

The watches were cheap, but the experience was priceless.

So, who wants a Geoffle for a 100% genuine replica Omega Seamaster?! Thanks to Egypt’s finest Pharoah draft beer I’ve got no less than 8 timepieces stashed in my suitcase.

Back to the cars tomorrow!!

We just landed. Blimey it’s cold.